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Pamo

Different behaviour of children in different environment

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Dear all,

Why, do you think, one child acts in one environment very calmly and, in the other, more aggressively? I know there are possibilities as many as there are children but, If you are so kind and share some of your guesses or even experiences, maybe how it would be with your, or other children around you, I would sincerely appreciate it. Thank you.

Pamo

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Tashi delek,

 

Why, do you think, one child acts in one environment very calmly and, in the other, more aggressively?

Environments are also composed of energy, subtile and less subtile (spiritual energies or simply hight voltage ones). We do interact with these energies. Some being more sensitive then some others. Energies are also created from all our emotions and thoughts.

Children are often very sensitive to energies, and they "mentalize" less than adults ie. they react more spontaneously to what they feel.

 

Of course, children are also very sensitive to what they absorbe as food or drinks. Sugar will increase significantly the level of excitability of many children. Some being, here again, more sensitive than some others.

 

All the best, Gelong T. Shenphen

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Tashi Delek.

 

A child is born. Curious and wondering, with the need to accept and to be accepted, vulnerable, depending on the environment unconditionaly. We should not forget that we, adults, are also creating the environment for the children. Not only those, who have our own children, yet all the adult people with our relations towards the Nature, towards each other, being compassionate, understanding, respecting, not turning back. Many children are passing our path by and all of them should be treated with great Love :% , specially those who are ill or handicaped.

What we perceive in the children, is exactly what we are giving to them.

 

Best regards,

 

Simona

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Tashi delek,

 

What we perceive in the children, is exactly what we are giving to them.

 

A child is not a white page when he comes into this existence. He comes with past accumulated karma, tendencies, habits also from previous lives.

Surely a child is influenced by the conditions we provide him with, but we shall not "idealize" a child as an angel at birth completely influenced by the surrounding. Indeed, sometime it's the child who change the surrounding of his own life!

 

But the question, as far as I understood, was about the same child changing his behaviour according to the environment; not why a child has such or such behaviour ;) .

 

All the best, Gelong T. Shenphen

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Tashi delek dear Rinpoche,

thank you.

I came in contradiction within myself; namely, by an expert - psychologist - I had been corrected that a child can as well act more aggressively at an environment where it feels safer, so the aggression would just tell about its being more relaxed. I understand that if some tensions are repressed within oneself for some time, they need to untie eventually, and that can happen where the ground is safe for that, but also still believe that, if these tensions are to come out at this so-called safer environment, they can not develope into the behaviour I would call aggressive. I too think it's hard to interact aggresivelly with the peaceful environment (unless there is not the child's karma's time to "speak", which has only partly to do with the actual environment).

:?:

All the very best,

Pamo

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Tashi Delek, Lama Shenphen Rinpoche.

 

Tashi delek, Pamo.

 

I was corrected that a child can as well act more aggressively at an environment where it feels safer, so the aggression would just tell about its being more relaxed.

 

My acquaintance, whos daugter is about 4 years old, told me that they started visiting the psychologist. A girl is acting the most calmly in the kindergarten, sitting in the corner usually. Even when somebody hit her, she would not react. And when the other children found out her non - reacting behaviour, they hit and attack her even more. There almost is no day, that a girl would not come from the kindergarten with some bumps. But there is a completely different story with a girl in the case, when mother is presented. When they both a mother and a girl visited some places, where children are presented, like playground or a shop in the afternoon, a girl would just rush forward the nearest child and started to hit and bite him, because of "nothing". I mean, the mother said that a child that her daughter attacked, did not do anything to her at all, he was just presented in the playground and doing his play. So, because those cases repeated many times, a mother took a girl to the psychologist, who is trying to make a girl to defend herself in the proper moments. It looks like that a girl is putting herself in the role of her "attackers", when she feels safe.

 

Best regards,

 

Simona

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Dear Simona,

 

It looks like that a girl is putting herself in the role of her "attackers", when she feels safe.

 

It does....and mom took her to psychologist for she doesn't know how to deal with that....maybe child's karma, maybe her not being at home with her calmness or, inner strength. Ahh, but that's every day's story of so many of us, and yes, probably the psychologist from the institution I work at spoke about that I suppose. I wonder how they will try to help this confused and insecure little girl... {..}

 

But, Simona, I see not the same calmess and being frozen (by maybe fear) to not be able to act...and where is the teacher to allow such behaviour of this girl's peers?!! 8O

 

Thank you for sharing...

 

Best regards,

Pamo

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Tashi Delek.

 

Although each human being is unique and special, yet there are some general facts. I can notice even how different is a behaviour of the same adult employee in the same environment, in the circumstances when he has a full support of the top managemnet and in the case, when such a support is taken away. In the first case, an employee would permit himself to act less tolerant towards the other people. Also sometimes this is the case with some political leaders, when the support of the broad masses is given to them. Well, there always could be find some outer or inner sources in everyone`s life to rely upon. How one would handle with powers, it is a question of the Ethic. It is said that an animal, it is not malicious by killing the other animal in order to provide food. An animal act from its instincts. In this way a human being relying upon the upper levels of the mind could act even more “brutal” as an animal.

I talked to a psyhologist, who is working with “problematic” children (mainly drugs). He said that after 20 years of work he found out that the children feel unsafe, if there are no firm and clear directions or precepts given to them. Children are able to develop into one way or into other way. The firm precepts are the firm frame, within a child can find his own stability and also instructions how to act and react in different moments of his life. That`s why I put the word problematic into inverted commas. Cause those children are not problematic by themselves, there is a lack of the role, which parents or the other adults, upon who a child depend the most on. Child`s confidence is endless and that`s why a great gift, an opportunity for the new start. Maybe this is also one of the reasons why a human birth is so precious, again and again a new opportunity to become a better sentient being for the sake of all sentient beings.

 

 

Best regards,

 

Simona

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